I was recently inspired by one of my buddies practicing his handstands while his fiancé and I took pics during a cloudy sunset. These guys are 2 of my closest friends & constantly motivate me with their approach to love & life.

Are they yogis? 

Err. No.

Do they meditate? 

Not unless you count them daydreaming about what they’re going to cook for dinner.

Their combined achievements range from finishing a Phd, working for the UN, recovering from cancer and now to filming a safari documentary in Africa.

I know huh?

And I thought that picking up my dog’s poo on the way to getting my coffee this morning was an accomplishment!

In fact, just moments after I met up with them, I had to traipse back to my car because I’d left my swimmers behind and then I lost my right contact lens after we had the good sense to high 5 each other with sandy palms!

By some miracle, I managed to find it on my sarong, but it took a while for my heart to find its regular heartbeat.

find-your-flow

And as you do when you’ve been mates with your close friends for a long time, we chatted about life, our (mis)adventures and ultimately how we’ve all finally made some sort of peace with how essential it is to find stillness in life.

Admittedly, we’ve passed the stage in our lives (our 20’s) where our drive was ambition based and adrenalin fueled.

For the most part, we’re also at a point where we’ve achieved enough of our goals to feel good about our street cred and have been humbled enough by our failures to know that they’re nowhere near as bad as we thought they’d be.

Finding your flow will also never happen if you are continuously comparing your own journey to someone else’s. If anything, that will make you plug into a frequency that simply isn’t yours to resonate, or vibrate with a consciousness that may not be true to your own belief systems.

I’ve got 3 pointers that help you find your flow that I wanted to share with you today and I’d love to hear your thoughts on them.

1. GOING BACKWARDS

There is no success without failure. Failure, in fact, may be our greatest teacher. Taking a step back in order to start again, see things from a different perspective or regenerate your energy can be one of the most powerful steps you can take towards your journey to success.

I once read that banks actually prefer to lend to those who have had companies that have closed down, reasoning that those who have lived through business flops and bankruptcy have learned many valuable lessons through the process of failure.

Have there been times in your life where you vowed you would never go back to:

• That partner

• That job

• That country

• Live with your parents

Many years ago I was in between homes and had to move in with my folks for what I had originally hoped would be a few weeks at the most.

9 months later I found my dream home, but that shift only manifested when my therapist finally got me to see the situation differently.

I had been wallowing in feelings of self pity and failure at having to take such a ‘massive-step-back’ in my life, when in reality, the only failure on my part was in not being grateful for the amazing stepping stone this opportunity had given me to not only save money, but to consolidate so many work opportunities.

2. STAYING STILL

Most of us have been so conditioned to continually create and to produce that we believe that there is something very wrong with us when we feel the need to stop.

I’ve seen this in my practice recently with some of my clients who want to clear the problem that they perceive is their lack of motivation.

And much like a wise medicine person once shared with me I too have been called to repeat this similar piece of advice – ‘the medicine is always in the pain.’

What do I mean?

After years of suffering from migraines, an adrenal burnout and a period of deep unhappiness, I speak not only from experience, but from a place of love when I say that when it comes to life and achieving your goals, you can’t force a flow.

Are you trying to force a flow?

Are you using words like ‘should’ or phrases such as ‘I better’?

A lack of motivation is usually your soul’s yearning for a deep rest and in today’s overworked society that demands some level of achievement; we forget that it’s ok to stop. In fact, it has been scientifically proven that you produce better results when you are well rested.

find-your-flow-patty-kikos

3. UPDATING YOUR COPING MECHANISMS

There is so much value in going with the flow while at the same time staying true to your values, and one of the concepts that inspires me most is the importance of upgrading your coping mechanism.

Sometimes we block a natural creative flow because what we’ve always done no longer works for us, while at other times we don’t realise that we need to ebb for a little while until we can once again generate a flow that is natural to us and is not forced.

Have you upgraded your coping mechanism?

Do you need to up level your tribe or maybe downsize a community that no longer supports you?

Are you frustrated because ‘you’ve always done it this way’, but it no longer seems to be working?

Your inspiration / creativity doesn’t get capped after a certain time

The source of your potential is limitless. But I get why you think it isn’t, because if you stop, it’s hard to find the same level of motivation. Right? But that’s the thing.

You’re not meant to. It will come again – just in a different way perhaps.

When you repeatedly answer the call of your inner muse, the neurotransmitters in your brain develop pathways that become familiar – it’s like building serious rapport with your creativity.

Once you do it regularly, it’s easier for you to find that ‘zone’ again. Kind of like that amazing friend you have where it doesn’t matter that you haven’t seen each other in ages, your connection is so strong, that you can pick up right where you left off as though no time has passed at all.

On Sunday 21 February I’m running a workshop that is based on the creative sacral chakra of your energy system called FIND YOUR FLOW – there are only 8 spots left and I would LOVE it if you joined this amazing group of creative and inspiring women that can also be inspired by your wisdom. CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE. 

patty-kikos-find-your-flow

 
 

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *