Hello lovely one, how is the end of 2021 going for you?

I’m treading rather gingerly, almost like before I agree to 2022, I’m going to have to read the fine print such on the terms and conditions a little more carefully before I agree to them.

Today marks the Solstice, and for me in Sydney, it’s the summer one – the longest day, signalling that each subsequent day will then get progressively shorter until March, when we celebrate the Equinox.

Much like the theme for 2021, I have felt a little gipped regarding the start of summer. I don’t know what the weather is like where you are, but we’ve had an uncharacteristically cold snap in December, and the sun only just got the memo about needing to shine, in the last few days. And boy has it been hot!

I love those steamy summer nights. They’re so balmy and raw, and the sticky heat makes me feel like I’m on holidays, even if I’m not. Last night I walked to the beach and had a swim and could smell someone smoking pot, among children squealing and lovers canoodling.

As I walked home munching on some hot chips and listening to a podcast, I realised I’d misplaced my sunglasses in the sand and smiled at the memory of other times where I myself had found someone else’s lost treasures at the beach.

Ahhh. The simple things.

I’m looking forward to having 2 whole weeks off, and I’m also aware that during that time, there are days that include Christmas and a few birthdays which are not necessarily associated as ‘down time’ for me.

If your family is anything like mine, those days can be intense and frenetic. Some of my family will be enjoying their first Christmas together, while for others like my dad, it could be his last.

It’s such a mix of feelings on a vast emotional spectrum, but it’s also something that I am welcoming as I consciously rest and reset. I’m looking forward to that junction between Christmas and new year when I have no idea what day it is.

I want to be lost in a sea of endless possibilities and wake up to a day that is not meticulously structured by each hourly increment, accompanied by a diary where I check tasks off my to do list.

Earlier in the year, I moved to a quieter sea side town. It was during lockdown, which made the move so much more stressful when I discovered that all my removalist contacts had upped and left the country or shut their businesses down.

I could hardly blame them, as nothing gets the blood pumping to your head faster than schlepping your belongings up and down 3 flights of stairs while wearing a mask. That frustration amplified faster than a phoenix rising from the ashes, but I also discovered that there’s another pandemic that people don’t talk about much – and that’s the one of leaf blowers.

So much for a quieter existence of working from home while your senses are being assaulted outside your office window.

At the moment, I’m carving out space for myself to check in with all aspects of my life. From my physical health to my work, from my family to my admin, from my friends to my alone time.

I can’t help but notice how much work has dominated my life over the past year and while this has been a blessing, continuing at this pace is just not sustainable. There are aspects of my life that are SCREAMING to be acknowledged such as my creativity with crafting an online course and making regular time to write.

So I’m looking at easy ways to implement these updates in my life. I don’t believe we need to do something huge to change our lives – that can actually create havoc for our nervous system. It’s often the subtle changes that are most effective when we can match them with a gentle discipline.

There’s a beautiful quote that I stumbled across today about how once we know better, we do better. I also believe that once we feel better, we can be better. The author wrote:

You can do better

But you couldn’t have done better.

Doing your best is a future tense activity.

It cannot be applied to the past.

Because if you could have done better, you would have.

This year especially, we have all done our best – even when we have not presented our best selves in certain situations.

We are living in a world with very new and confronting scenarios that we have no orientation point for. For many of us, these circumstances have never occurred to us before, so we have no reference point for how to act accordingly, much less appropriately.

Just the other day, after being on hold for an hour with zero resolution from my bank, I had to tell the assistant that I was slowly starting to lose the will to live, and that even though I knew it wasn’t her fault, I had to hang up because I was *this* close to swearing, and didn’t want to do that to her. Bless her for calling me back the next day with a great outcome.

Much like a seasoned poker player can pick another player’s ‘tell’, and get a sense of the cards they have been dealt, I am also very aware of my own ‘tell’ when it comes to being out of alignment. The first thing that wanes is my sense of humour, followed closely by my patience.

And then the shit show really starts because this takes me down the rocky path of rage and resistance and when I can’t laugh or flow creatively, I become rigid and closed off. And that’s not who I want to be.

I hope you find some time over the holidays to refine your life and make any appropriate edits that will bring you more love, joy and peace. And if it’s something else you’re calling in, may you pave the way for it to come to you in a blessed way.

So this is where I leave you for today and for this year. Wherever you are and whatever you’re doing, I look forward to us reconnecting again in the new year. May the solstice light bring you clarity, and help you shine your unique light even brighter.

Until next time, sending you lots of love.

Patty Kikos