Does saying ‘yes’ to every opportunity mean that we will never go without? What if we could make the fist dent in the Universe by saying ‘no’ to what isn’t quite right for us?
- For many of us that need to pay our rent or mortgage as well as our utilities, we use money as a form of exchange for goods and services like food, electricity, clothes and services.
- For any new worker that has just started a new job, we usually say yes to pending projects so that we can make a good first impression.
- For those of us that meet our partner’s family for the first time, we usually avoid telling their Uncle Bob that he’s actually a creepy sleaze who invades our personal space.
- For any new yoga teacher or therapist, we usually put ourselves out there in a big way in terms of teaching way too many classes and seeing way too many clients in order to gain experience and build our street cred.
- For anyone that’s about to have their earning compromised, we hustle like a demon in order to manifest work opportunities so our kids don’t go without and mortgage or rent payments aren’t missed.
But there comes a time where sometimes the act of saying ‘no’ can actually bring us many more opportunities that resonate with our truth and our sense of boundaries a little better.
I recently went overseas for several weeks and this tied in nicely with a friend from interstate needing somewhere to stay in Sydney for the same period of time.
It seemed to be synchronistic and I was happy to chat about the possibility of her staying in my home provided that she covered the rent for that period.
She came back with an offer to pay a heavily reduced rate as it was all she could afford, and since the property was vacant, wasn’t part of the rent paid better than no rent paid at all?
So despite my reservations, I considered it. I didn’t want to cut my nose off just to spite my face.
But the truth is, something felt very off with her offer of paying considerably less despite having full access to all of the amenities such as my car space, wifi and cable. It just wasn’t sitting very well with me as I wasn’t asking for a contribution to the bills such as gas, electricity or internet.
Did I want someone in my home paying only part of the rent? On an energetic level, did I want to open my home office space up to a compromise that would leave me feeling gipped and resentful? Did I want to start the new year plugging into a poverty consciousness that wasn’t mine.
Energy is intention and intention is prayer. I want my space to be a hub for abundance and pure transformation. So I said no.
Recently, I tried to book in with my massage therapist and found the time I usually schedule was no longer available. When I asked her about it she explained that she now had Mondays off as this was her only chance to decompress from working on Saturday and spending all day doing fun family stuff with her husband and kids on the Sunday.
Because of how amazing she is, changing my regular time with her was a no brainer and easy enough to do.
And for those clients of hers that only have Mondays off and pleaded with her to reconsider?
She tells me that she thought about it for a while, but the strain that it would put on her energy levels was too big a cost to bear. They’d have to either find another therapist or find another time to see her.
I feel compelled to share these stories with you as last week, the southern hemisphere celebrated Hallowe’en, (Samhain pronounced Sow-en) which is celebrated on October 31st in the Northern Hemisphere.
Jane Collins explains this harvest period beautifully when she says, ‘as Mother Earth teaches us, if you didn’t plant in Spring or if you didn’t care for the vulnerable sprouts or the growing vine during the growth cycle, then there will be no harvest, simple as that.
These final ‘fruits’ you are harvesting now, are what you have to sustain you through the winter months when there is no outward growth. Find these ‘fruits’ when you look at your life both literally and metaphorically. Look at your health, your relationships, your work, your life situation, what looks like the fruits, the harvest?
Remember, the ‘fruits’ also hold the ‘seeds’ of what will grow in the next growth cycle, they hold the lessons available to be learned from all you’ve done this growth cycle so far, since the beginning back in Spring earlier in the year. Have you been saying yes to things that no longer serve you?
Because these seeds will gestate over the Winter, and be what will be reborn in the Spring. This happens literally in the garden and metaphorically in our lives, and often unconsciously, this is what’s going on when you have a sense of ‘the same old same old’ happening in your life’.
Think back to this time last year. Were you honoring your truth? Because chances are, if you were only doing this in a halfhearted manner, you probably manifested only half of what you really wanted last Spring.
I’ll leave you with this article from Elephant Journal which outlines 10 types of odd friendships that you’re probably still part of. I loved it and found it equal parts hilarious and equal parts timely for this part of the year.
May you sow what you wish to see grow my friend. I’m sending so much love and light on your path of love, happiness and prosperity, Patty xx
Loved this post, Patty! And I totally agree! I don’t think we should subject ourselves to meaningless friendships, forced interactions, and unnecessary conversations. We all need to practice some self love and embody the power of no.
Thanks Lindsey – love your site!